Many Turquoise Rings Admired

The Maitre d’ said, “I have seen many turquoise rings that I have admired, even some antique ones from medieval times. They have some beautiful ones at the Harry Potter Magic Shop here in the village. In fact, the wizard has a very old one in the shape of a snake. Turquoise eyes, can you just imagine?

“But, madam, you have the most exquisite turquoise ring I think I have ever seen.” He took Flora’s hand and held it close to his face.

“Absolutely stunning!”

“Now for the flaming ‘cochon roses.’   Enjoy!”

Flames were leaping toward the ceiling. The other diners were turning in their seats to watch the spectacle. Bernice heard the gasps. She turned and saw the other diners holding tiny hooves to their mouths. Was the Maitre d’ going too far? Was this whole show becoming dangerous?

The Maitre d’ took a large piece of something, cake or pie or ice cream, and placed it before Flora. Then he took another piece and placed it before Bernice. (It looked like ice cream.)

Then he stood straight and said, “Now Mesdames, for the ‘piece de resistance,’ my special, unduplicated flaming sauce.  Fanfare of trumpets, please.”

To Bernice’s surprise there actually was a fanfare of trumpets.

The Maitre d’ poured the flaming sauce over Flora’s dessert. Flames leaped high.

Bernice screamed. Flora’s long curly hair was sparkling all around her face.  “Her hair, her hair’s on fire!”

The Maitre d’ gasped. “Oh my, oh my. What can we do?  This has never happened before, but you do look lovely, my dear, sparkling like a Christmas tree. I must take a photo of you. Lovely, lovely.”

The sparkling tips of Flora’s wild and crazy hair began crackling like little firecrackers. Pop! Pop! Sizzle, pop!

Some of the other diners were standing and looking at Flora. One said, “Here, use my camera. Quickly, quickly before the lady explodes. Oh my, oh my!”

Bernice reached out to touch Flora’s arm. She said, “Are you all right?”

Flames leaped from Flora’s hair to the front of Bernice’s angora sweater.

The Maitre d’ stood at their table trying to line up a good view. “This is just wonderful,” he said. “I’ve never had such a spectacle before. My ‘flaming cochon rose’ will become world famous. I hope you don’t sizzle out and explode before I get the perfect shot.

“There, I got it, perfect!”

He returned the camera to the diner who was wearing several mens turquoise rings.